You Bastard Perry.

He’s asked for the ring back, the tight bastard. What kind of man would do that? It only cost him $69 and he wants it back. I always new he was a bit shifty when it came to putting his hands in his pocket, but asking for the ring back has even shocked me. Worse to come is that he hasn’t asked her face to face, he sent her a text. Anyway it’s off and that’s all there is to it. I don’t know what he will do now, there can’t be many blind birds left can there? Anyway at least he is being a true man to the end because he told me that he’s letting her stay in the house, hat’s off to him for that.

I didn’t expect it to last. I have known him too long now. Just passed the lamp post and here’s what I find, Perry was kidding all along. It’s the oldest trick in the book isn’t it? Proposing to a young bird just to get in her knickers. You dirty old twat Perry, shame on you. Taking advantage of a nice young lady and then dropping her like this. Well I suppose if it’s off you will be looking for somewhere to have a break, I have just the place for you here in Boca Chica. No thieving taxi drivers to worry about either, so I will look up some dates and contact you via the normal channels.

Well I can’t understand what the fuck is going on now, he must of lost his marbles. It certainly isn’t the Perry that I used to know. I mean asking for her hand in marriage, he must be on the drugs again, that’s all I can think of. I mean after 6 marriages, 3 divorces and 17 kids what can he be thinking about? Perry you need help mate, drop me a email and we can talk about this. Someone needs to talk sense to you and quickly, I have visions of you ending up on the fucking Oprah show, and that’s about as low as it gets. I just hope that either she’s worth it my friend or you come to your senses very quickly. Before I forget, if you want to know of a good stag night location, we are still here for you in your hour of need and desperation.

Well it seems like we have lost one of our best guests, Perry it appears as at last fallen in love with a nice young lady called Jennifer.

Now I don’t know Jennifer but I am sure she will be the homely kind and will keep Perry warn in the winter evenings that are on their way. As opposites attract I suspect she is a small petite, kind and considerate person, with a sense of humour, well she must have a sense of humour to be with Perry musn’t she?  I must admit though that I am suprised he as gone public and showed his affection with a nice sign. I am very impressed that he spelt her name correctly too, this is a big improvement on the Perry that I once knew. Well all I can say my friend is good luck in your new love venture, everyone here at the resort wishes you all the best for the future.